Missouri, Must Love Rednecks

The weather is cooling in Illinois and I am less likely to be in the woods cutting firewood and more likely to be sitting at the computer blogging. I am hoping to provide you with more opportunities to look at the world through my twisted view.

Friday was the 38th anniversary of the best day of my life. That is the day that Carol joined me in the joys of wedded bliss. While every day has not been filled with rainbows and unicorns, I would not trade the last 38 years for those years with anyone else. She is and always shall be the love of my life.

We took a trip to Missouri wine country for our anniversary and had a wonderful weekend. We started off going to Augusta and visiting the local brewery and winery. Then off to visit a few other wineries in the area. When the day was done we went to Hermann, Missouri for an overnight stay at a bed and breakfast called the Wine Country Inn. After a meal at the Black Walnut (highly recommended by us if you want a great meal) then off to the Inn for a relaxing night trying some of the wine purchased earlier in the day. The next day we were off to West Plains to see some friends and that is when we happened across a few things that I found amusing.

Our first stop in the strange state of Missouri, a small town called Bland.

 

They are clearly proud of their over 100 years of Bland. I didn't get to talk to any of the residents of Bland but I suspect the celebration was somewhat muted. I can almost hear them saying things like: "It was okay, nothing special." or "Just another day in a blah life."

 





The Bland Christian Church would seem an unlikely place to hear any of the hell fire and brimstone preaching you expect in the Bible Belt. What do you think of Jesus? He's all right. You know, Prince of Peace, Lord of Lords, I guess all of that is okay and all. It's hard to get too excited when you are bland. As you will see things are about to change in Missouri. While many miles don't separate these towns I think my view of them puts them a universe apart.

We have arrived at Licking.Missouri. I enlarged this picture so you could see the sign in the background. They enforce the noise ordinance. Licking is okay but no slurping. Apparently if licking leads to excessive moaning or screaming you may be cited for an ordinance violation.

 



Now you have to ask yourself a question. Would you rather attend church at the Bland Christian Church or the Licking Pentecostal Holiness Church? I am sure in Licking Pentecostal you are sure to hear a few "Praise the Lord" and "Thank you Jesus" and "Oh God" along the way. If you don't perhaps you should head down the street for some training.

You can apparently take some training classes at Licking Elementary. It appears to have the support of the local Parent Teacher Organization. I think probably only the basics are taught there as down the street you could attend another school.

Yes folks you can move on to Licking High School. I think it is completely appropriate and perhaps a bit of bragging to indicate you are home of the "Wildcats". I guess if you are at that level in Licking you have reason to have confidence in your ability. Apparently for those folks who are adventurous they have the Licking Alternative School. I am hoping in the future to send off for a list of class offerings.

 

A progressive community Licking even has a Park Plaza. It is good to have a Licking Park. Monkey Bars, swings, slides, all the things one might need for a good time Licking.

 



No visit would be complete without a visit to the Licking water tower. Does it strike anyone else as odd that the word Licking is on the upright shaft of the tower rather than the tank? Seems like a message of some sort.

As we left Licking I noticed a road sign that  indicated Success, Missouri was 15 miles down the road. Another message? Classes, religion and some Licking Wildcat effort can eventually lead to Success. Those rednecks may be on to something.