Undefeated

Early this morning our dear friend Joyce, wife of Danny, mother of Tom, Jane, Phyllis and Joe died after a brief and courageous battle with cancer. It is reasonable to wonder why the title is undefeated. Because it is true. Cancer may have ravaged Joyce's body but her spirit was never broken. She could look ahead at what was coming and fight with all she had. Things got tough and she never gave in. There was never a "why me" uttered. No looking for someone to complain to or blame. No time for that there was a battle to wage against the disease that would eventually take her life. Complaining doesn't win the fight. Determination does. Joyce fought on her terms. She lived her life her way. She was a wonderful mother who, with Danny, raised four great children. Yesterday was about growing old. One of the unfortunate realities about getting older is learning of the death of old friends. They simply cannot be replaced. We have known Joyce and Danny since the early 1970's. There is no way to count the number of times we have sat around kitchen tables and drank pot after pot of coffee. We talked about everything under the sun. We watched our kids play together. We saw each other grow old. Today, we said goodbye to Joyce. Those who know me understand that I am not a religious man. I don't know what happens to us after we die. If there is a life after this one then I will see Joyce again. If there isn't I still appreciate everything she showed me about how to live. Life can be tough and it was hard at times for Joyce, Dan and their kids. It never has and never will defeat them. Joyce was as strong as they come. It was a privilege to know Joyce, to call her a friend. The best times in life are often spent over a cup of coffee talking about everything or nothing. Just talking. No judgment. No anger. Just conversation and coffee. I'm going to miss that. Thanks Joyce for the memories. Dan, you walk the path alone now but know that in so many ways Joyce will always be with you. In every day you will see things that remind you of her. I hope they bring you comfort. She loved you in every moment of every day.