Those F-ing Kids

It would be easy to make this about Bristol Palin. You might remember her mother Sarah who was selected by John McCain to be his vice presidential candidate. She is pregnant for the second time out of wedlock. The fact that gets my interest is her and many on the political right who advocate sex education programs that focus mainly on abstinence. Nancy Reagan told us to fight the drug abuse problem in the United States by just saying "No!" The desire and need for illegal drugs is an easier battle than the one where we tell teenagers to ignore those raging hormones and abstain from sex. While I agree that no one who completely abstains from sexual intercourse will ever get pregnant (well there is one alleged notable exception- Jesus Christ- He is always messing up a good point) it seems unlikely that those f-ing kids will cooperate with the program. It isn't that they just want kids to abstain from regular penis-vagina sex. They want abstinence from any kind of sexual activity. They refer to anal sex as a "dangerous trend". They describe all the possible sexually transmitted diseases that can result from oral sex. How do they describe abstinence? "Abstinence is refraining from all sexual activity. Sexual activity refers to actions intended to result in sexual arousal or gratification. Sex includes penile-vaginal, anal and oral sex. Other actions intended to result in arousal or gratification, including but not limited to, masturbation, mutual masturbation, fondling, the use of sex toys, and the viewing of pornography." What's a kid to do?

In the big picture I don't worry about Bristol. She has a supportive family who will rally around her. They will see that she and her children are fed, clothed, housed, educated and all the other things children need in this world. Many single moms out there don't have those support systems. Many, who feel abstinence only education is best, also oppose welfare, food stamps, Medicaid, WIC, free early childhood education, affordable housing and abortion. You are important to them when you are a fetus but when you exit the womb you are not their problem.

Let's be realistic here. Kids will be kids. Teens will be teens. If you have an internet connection they will see porn. They are going to know about sex. Telling a teen they can't or shouldn't do something is like trying to tell the earth to stop spinning on its axis. You words will be out there but they will not change what is going to happen. You cannot and will not be with them every minute of every day. They will figure out how to get their sexy bits together as surely as the sun will rise in the east tomorrow. If all you want them taught in school was abstinence then be prepared for a new phase in your life. You will be a grandparent. Soon.

What are the alternatives? Let's take a look at Colorado. You know the state that legalized pot. Seems to me that loaded folks would be less inhibited and more likely to involve themselves in risky behavior like unprotected sex. Colorado has expanded free and low cost birth control access. The Colorado Family Planning Initiative provided 68 clinics with 30,000 intrauterine devices for low income teens and college aged women at low cost or free. Between 2009 and 2013 the teen birth rate in Colorado dropped 40%. It seems unlikely to me that there was 40% more abstinence among teens during that time period. The program provided IUD's because it didn't require teens to remember to take a birth control pill every day. The teen abortion rate also fell by 35% and in just 2010 alone the state of Colorado saved 42 million dollars in health care costs the state would have paid for teen pregnancies under Medicaid. Explain to me why conservatives are opposed to a program that reduces abortions, saves money in government health care costs, allows young women to continue to work towards their dreams and achieve their educational goals that are so often derailed by unintended pregnancy. Oh, that's right, if we allow them birth control we are somehow giving them permission to have premarital sex. You might want to keep this in mind if that is your position on the issue.

THEY ARE GOING TO BE SEXING IT UP WITHOUT YOUR PERMISSION GRANDPA AND GRANDMA.