I'm a Simple Man

I think I learned a long time ago what the key was to open the lock on happiness. It is quite simply, low expectations. Not low expectations for myself but of what I expected from everyone else and from life in general. 

I was thinking the other day about cell phones. I have an Apple iPhone. It does lots of things that I don't understand, don't need and don't use. I told Carol in keeping with my low expectations that I only want two things from my phone. It must be able to make and receive calls. It must not catch on fire and burn down my house or burn up my car. 

Isn't that an interesting turn of a phrase. Why does my house burn down and my car burn up? 

Is it wrong to want politicians to tell the truth? Talk about issues and not the alleged shortcomings of their opponent? I did however enjoy the comment last week about Hillary Clinton. An Hispanic follower of Donald Trump stated if she won there would be taco trucks on every corner. If I had been on the fence it would change my vote to Hillary. 

There are lots of jokes out there about Chuck Norris. I think my favorite is this one. Why does Chuck Norris sleep with a light on? Because the dark is afraid of Chuck Norris. Why are there no Bruce Lee jokes?

Seems reasonable. 

I kept going to McDonalds and being disappointed with the alleged food. Was it too much to ask that the meat, cheese and condiments be inside the bun? I realize these are low paying, low skill jobs. Don't they still demand the employee take some measure of pride I their work? I have determined the best solution is to never eat at McDonalds again. I doubt they will miss me. 

In closing, shoot low and you will never be disappointed.