Frustration

When I was a younger man I thought I knew all the answers. I had it all figured out. Now being older I am not sure if I even know the right questions. The answer to today's question is one that has perplexed me for a few years. What is worse? Being Stephen Hawking and having a body that doesn't work. Being Ronald Regan and having a mind that stopped working. Clearly both outcomes are horrors but is one worse than the other. I don't know. I have known people with various forms of dementia. I have never had a close friend who had ALS. Why the question? We recently got back from a cruise on the Disney Dream and it had been my intent to continue that story in today's blog. My mother in law accompanied us on the trip and she saw the doctor today. She has a variety of health problems which she denies. While, to be completely honest, she does not have dementia; she passed the test by one point. She clearly has some cognitive impairment. It is not something that people who have it admit. They never say "I have dementia!" it is always a constant state of denial. I might be normal but if I suggest something to her that doesn't match up with her confused memories then I am the one who is fucked up in the head. She went to have a followup with her cancer doctor last week and Carol and her ended up talking to one of my former coworkers from the prison. My coworker was there to get an iron injection. My mother in law insisted after the woman walked away that she was there for a lead injection. I think I would stay out of that HMO.
My mother in law has smoked for years and from time to time quits. She has started again after being diagnosed with COPD. She has now begun to deny the COPD and claims her death rattle cough is from her allergies and sinus. It was fun riding in a car with her for a 20 hour drive each direction from Illinois to Florida for vacation. Getting to listen to her trying to cough of a chunk of lung butter and then wanting to tell me about it when she was successful. Sorry, don't need those details. We tried to get her to buy some medication to deal with her cough and congestion after she told us she had left those medications at home. Off to a WalMart we went and after looking through all the cold and sinus medications she said they didn't carry her brand at that WalMart. What brand do you take? Hyvee! Well a store brand is a little tough to find when you are 5 states from the nearest store. Can't explain why she thought WalMart would carry another store's brand.
She went to the doctor today and was told she had COPD again and now needed inhalers and a prescription to help her stop smoking if she wanted to stop. She said she did but we will see. Carol tried to discuss her inappropriate behavior with her and she got defensive and argumentative. Said she  did not enjoy the cruise we took her on because it wasn't fun and she claimed she had told us she didn't want to go to the Bahamas.  Said it wasn't like other cruises she had been on and she had enjoyed them. There was too much walking. Food wasn't to her liking. Her roommate kept the room too cold. So here I am going, wow I paid for all this. The cruise, your motel rooms on the way, the gas for the car, the cruise excursions, basically everything. I don't get a thank you I get you didn't have a good time and you are pissed off. We took her on a cruise because she said she wanted to go on one again. I understand you have mental health issues that you deny. You claim we are trying to run your life. From today forward that won't be a problem. When you need something you can call and ask. If you don't ask I am not doing anything. As far as your mental health issues your daughter in Tennessee can handle all those concerns and set up your appointments. If you call we will give you a ride. You can call her and tell her about how your poop looks and what color it is and how you are worried about your liver. I officially don't give a shit about your shit.